we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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