I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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