And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
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