she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize