Hey man sorry I got all grabby
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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