I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
