woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Randomize