she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
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