she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
