Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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