i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Randomize
