And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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