oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
