yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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