didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
love makes seman taste better
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Randomize