I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
