The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
