There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Randomize
