Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
i out mim tonsoeep
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
