just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
