Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
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