Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
