she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Randomize
