The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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