the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize