I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
