so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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