I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
They should really pass out barf bags in church
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
