Even the bartender felt bad for me
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Just high enough for therapy.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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