how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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