sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Randomize
