How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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