and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
