She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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