it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
