@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
