We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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