Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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