Umm I'm too high to move.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
i out mim tonsoeep
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