do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
