Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Randomize
