Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
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