a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Randomize
