I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
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