I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
