Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize