Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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