dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
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