i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Randomize
