it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I fill condoms, not promises.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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