what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
